I just witness a breathless sunrise as warmth as her sweet embrace.
I couldnt sleep, been thinking about her the whole night.
I tired, no matter how I toss and turn, I just couldnt sleep.
This is getting to me, its beginning to eat into me. I fear very soon, I
may not last long enough before I break down again.
The past few days have been a roller coaster ride of sorts. Emotions run
high and low. I just couldnt comprehend what the hell is going on.
On my bed I mull over questions and answers related to certain issues.
I just cannot find the answer. It bothers me. I try to find excuses and
even tried reasoning out with myself the possibilities of such actions.
I still cannot find the answers. It eats into me just like being infected
with incurable dieases that breaks you down slowly and finally take your
scumbag life away. For this matter, mine!
Now, I dont think I am really a scumbag. I have tried my very best to be
the person she wanted me to be. I had gave in 101% but it just dont work.
The damn key just dont unlock the door to her, to her world. What in the
damnation of all things I have to do to unveil that door? I have done almost everything for her, just her alone. Is that not enough?
Perhaps I think too much, maybe, just maybe I'm being melodramatic and overly sensitive. Some say I am overly sensitive, which is good but it works against me. ALWAYS! I can vouch to that.
I feel better now venting my thoughts here. Perhaps I can turn in now.
The sunrise is really beautiful beyond description. It kinda gave me hope.
It's like telling me there is more to the darkness I just faced, that there is
still light and rays of hope. Now, a new day has come and new hopes are
born. Dont fret now, it will be better..
Alot of questions remains unanswered, I could not really comprehend.
The flame within seems to be dying but at times it was revived.
But yet I could not get a answer and I could not comprehend.
At this point, only time will tell.
If I should die this very moment I wouldn't fear for
I've never known completeness like being here
wrapped in the warmth of you loving every breath of you
still my heart this moment oh it might burst
could we stay right here till the end of time until the earth stops turning wanna love you until the seas run dry I've found the one I've waited for
all this time I've loved you and never known your face
all this time I've missed you and searched this human race
here is true peace here my heart knows calm
safe in your soul bathed in your sighs wanna stay right here
till the end of time till the earth stops turning
gonna love you until the seas run dry I've found the one I've waited for
the one I've waited for
all I've known
all I've done
all I've felt was leading to this
all I've known
all I've done
all I've felt
was leading to this
wanna stay right here till the end of time till the earth stops turning
gonna love you till the seas run dry I've found the one I've waited for
As I cradled her close to me, just like a baby, close to my heart.
The peaceful and contented look on her face brings a smile to my face.
As she wandered into a land of dreams and contentment.
I just wanted to hold her even tighter never to let her go.
I just want to kiss her smooth tender face, like a baby.
I wish I could tell her how much I missed her.
I wish I could tell her how much I love her.
Just as when I am reveling in the sweet embrace.
She has awakened and I had to let her go.
Reluctantly, I let her from my embrace.
Father time is just so cruel to me.
I wish time would stop right there and then.
I wish I could just hold her like that forever and ever.
We parted good-byes, with bitter sweet after taste in my heart.
I just wanted to embrace her one more time before she goes.
And tell her how much I love her.
But time is not my side now....
I will wait..
Yes I will..
The reason..
I love her
I have to write or rather type as a matter of fact. I am too bottled up now.
I have lost the sense of belonging. I shouldnt have come back. I feel that I dont belong here. But what am I to do.
I thought wrong in so many ways,
I thought wrong in believing,
I thought everything was ok, I really did.
I thought wrong.
Then come the next question, why?
But what am I to do?
I thought I had a chance.
Everything was so good, almost too good.
It was so surreal till the truth hits me.
I thought wrong.
But what am I to do?
I thought I was forgiven.
I thought I had a direction, a focus.
I thought wrong, now that it is in the light.
Everything I thought of is shattered.
Millions of pieces, my dreams, my hopes.
How am I ever to mend it back.
But what am I to do?
Have you ever think that you are living in a world of deception.
Where everything you believed, that it is real, but, perhaps it might not be
what is seems, rather it is all just a farce to make things look lovely.
Well.. I have. I am feeling that now. I am believing the unbelieveable, up till now.
I cannot, simply cannot comprehend, the things that are going on right now.
It is simply too warped. Too mind blowing.. giangantus maximus!
At the end of it all, even if it too out of the world for me to understand.
I only know that God is good. That is all I know and that's all I have to say..
So the new year came and past. It wasnt anything much to rave about but on the
contrary, there are many things to ponder upon. In the wake of the recent disaster,
I came to realise that our lives are so fragile. One minute we are happyily leading our
sorrid lives and the next, by the weird awesome power of the natural or unforseen
forces takes it away. This is all in God's planning and we gives thanks to Him even
when we failed to see the BIG picture of the end result.
People will say, if God is all that powerful, He would have stoped this disaster from
happening. I would only say that it is all in His big plan that He allowed this calamity
to happen so that His people will wake up and know that the end times are near and
will get their butt of their comfortable chairs and reached out to the world. We, as
God's children know the ultimate end, and He will reign victorious! For the battle was
won, so written in the bible.
Then I looked at myself, I have decided, I want to doing His work when He return.
I do not want to be caught not doing His work when He returns. Amen.
That would also means that if I had to not have the chance to be with the girl I so dearly
love and want to be together with her all my life. To take care of her for as long as I live.
And ultimately to be able to call her, yes you, my loving wife. I will still obey His will,
for He is the truth, the way and life. His greatest commission, to reach out to the nations.
So here's your holiday, hope you enjoy this time, you take it all away..
It was mine, so when your are dead and gone..
Hope you remember this night twenty years now lost,
its not right
